Top 10 Most Important Do's and Don'ts during a Child Custody Battle

Going through a child custody battle is one of the most difficult times in a person’s life. Most people want to know, “How do I win custody of my child?” When fighting for custody or visitation of your child, there are many things that a judge is going to take into consideration when determining the custody that is in your child’s best interest. Therefore, everything you do must reflect your concern for your child’s welfare. Here is a list of the most important things to do while fighting for custody of your child.

1. Stay up to date on all child support payments.
Regardless of which parent is ordered to pay child support, the judge is going to look at the payments – or lack thereof – as an indication of his or her concern for the child. Set reminders for yourself before the payment is due, or set it up to be taken out of your paycheck. Most important, make certain that there is a record of every payment. If you don’t pay through the Attorney General’s office, always pay by check and get the receipts from the bank.

2. Stay out of trouble with the law.
You absolutely do not want to give the other parent anything to use against you in court. One of the worst things that you can do is to break the law. Charges such as driving under the influence, drug use, and assault can be deal-breakers in the judge’s eyes. Because this is so important, it is best to avoid all situations that could put you in danger of slipping up. For example, limit your alcohol when at a party and always take a taxi or have a designated driver.

3. Be careful when using social media.
Oftentimes, the most damaging information that the other side will have against you comes directly from you – through your Facebook page. Posting pictures or comments that can be taken out of context or used in a negative light can be very damaging. Even an innocuous posting can create a storm of other comments that can be used by the other parent to prove impropriety. The best thing to do is to delete (or hide or drastically reduce usage of) all social media accounts, with the exception of any that are specifically for business or work.

4. Control your emotions.
Divorce and custody battles are inevitably the most contentious and emotionally turbulent times of a person’s life. Unfortunately, this can lead to heated exchanges between you and your ex. Of course, you should never lose control of your emotions in front of your child, but ideally, you should not lose control at all. Try to find ways to stay calm while with your ex. This will go a long way to show the judge that you are concerned only with the best interest of your child and not your own problems.

5. Hire an attorney.
Many people try to save money during a custody dispute by not hiring an attorney and representing themselves. This can be a huge mistake, especially when the other parent has an attorney. If you try to represent yourself, the judge is not allowed to treat you any differently than an attorney. Therefore, you will have to be aware of all required court procedures and deadlines, as well as the underlying law. This can be a very difficult task, and there are many ways that it can end up hurting you.


10 Biggest Mistakes that you Can Make During a Child Custody Case

Many people involved in a dispute involving their children want to know, “How do I win a child custody case?” or “How do I get visitation rights?” But, sometimes, knowing what not to do can be even more important than knowing what to do. Fighting for custody or visitation of your child can be one of the most contentious and emotionally taxing times in a person’s life. Because of this, it is easy to get caught up in the emotional turmoil and make mistakes that you would not normally make. Even worse, these mistakes can cost you the most precious thing in your life – time with your child or children. Here is our list of mistakes to avoid during a child custody case.

1. Breaking the law
One major mistake that the other parent can use against you in court is an arrest or worse, a conviction. Avoid situations that put you in danger of breaking the law. For example, limit your drinks at the party, or better yet, don’t drink at all. An arrest for DUI, assault, or any other of the bad decisions that sometimes accompany alcohol will absolutely hurt your chances of getting custody.

2. Maintaining a presence on social media
Social media – such as Facebook – is a big part of many people’s lives, and it may have its benefits. However, there is virtually no benefit to posting anything on the Internet about your life while you are in a custody battle. More often than not, most of the dirt that an ex-spouse finds on the other parent is on his or her own Facebook page. The best thing to do is delete all social media, especially any type of dating application, from your life during this period.

3. Moving in with someone
Your child’s life is being disrupted a great deal already, and any extra change can be very upsetting for the child (as well as for the other spouse). The judge will be looking at the living situation at your home and how it affects the child. A new significant other or even a roommate is often seen as an unnecessary and possibly threatening addition to the child’s life.


What is the difference between mediation and trial?

Mediation vs. Trial in Child Custody.

trial vs. mediationDivorce and custody disputes end in one of two ways, by agreement or by trial. From the day one spouse decides to file for divorce, the parties are free at any point to settle their claims and disputes through private agreement. Often, such an agreement is reached when both sides realize that a further escalation of their litigation is not worth it, either because the costs involved exceed the envisaged outcome, or because, for example, the spouses hope that private settlement will improve and stabilize their relationship in the interest of their children. While the parties may settle in any way they deem preferred, the most common way divorces and custody disputes are being settled is by mediation.


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